Introduction
I was never really interested in talking about myself or my work but the work led me to accept myself as a composite of a body and a soul which then made me realize that
writing about myself and my life can have scientific value. I have also realized that my type of soul doesn't only have short-term goals concerning the current incarnation
but its primary mission, is inevitably inter-incarnational.
I believe the word mission here is appropriate given how determined my soul is in fulfilling, what seems to be, its destiny.
By my theories and hypotheses, evidence for reincarnation of souls, among other things, can be found in comparison of mental and physical characteristics and experiences between
incarnations. Therefore, the primary purpose of this biography is to increase available evidence for reincarnation of souls. At this point, however, the majority of the human world is not ready for
my discoveries (because they are profound). In fact, it might never be before it gets extinct, and that may actually be for the best. Thus, it seems I'm writing this too primarily to my future
self, believing there is a way for this to be passed on to it even if my knowledge doesn't become public knowledge.
My work has led me to believe that human souls won't be reincarnating on the surface of the Earth beyond this century, or, beyond the 24th century - in an alternative
scenario. In case of the former, the humanity might be extinct by the year 2066, which is the most likely year of my death as well. There is some possibility, however, that I am
going to die at the age of 50±2 and incarnate at least once more on the surface on Earth (probably living up to the age of 36-37 in that incarnation). Thus, that may be the person
whom I'm writing this to.
Destiny, reducing density of the pit of suffering
While I was working on Complete Relativity (CR) or The Solar System I kept
telling people I'm writing a scientific paper but they kept saying I am writing a book. I didn't get the meaning of that then, but now I came to realize that I was destined to write at least one
book after all. So, here it is. This, however, I'd call one of short-term destinies or goals of my evolution. The long-term or inter-incarnational one is, of course, to understand the universe
observable outside me, unobservable inside me and the one I am.
The more I understand the more I can observe, the more I do not see and the more I know there is to me, so the quest may go on forever.. but that seems not to bother the self of me.
Why do I have this insatiable urge to understand is hard to tell. I could say that's simply the way I'm programmed but why was I programmed that way then? Well, the world cannot be an endless web
of lies in an infinite pit of deception, someone has to be programmed to see the rays of truth and seek the way out. The better question is why was I born in it in the first place, to what degree
have I deserved it and to what degree I'm yet to deserve it?
If everything is completely relative, as I do find, how relative is my karma? It is clear that, with every incarnation one is a different being and even that being is evolving during life, so it is
clear that whatever one deserves one deserves it relatively. Identity is relative. To what degree will I, and to what degree will someone close to I, suffer for my "sins" and to what degree will I suffer
for its own? Relativity is confusing to those accustomed to the comfort-zone of an absolute point of view. In other words, reality is confusing to those accustomed to illusion. That's why
most people don't understand me - I am too real for them. Among such people it's my short-term destiny for my long-term me and its long-term solutions to be ignored, pushed aside or
ridiculed. My recurring short-term destiny in this world seems to be the [cyclic] suffering, but I believe its magnitude is decreasing proportionally to my increasing knowledge. After all, cultivation of
knowledge is cultivation of power. With enough power, there is no pit one cannot subdue.
The numbers, bloody numbers, at the gates of knowledge
Some say that mathematics is human invention, but absolutely that's not true, we're only noting what we observe in our languages and one of these is mathematics. Nature is full
of numbers, it is counting, adding, subtracting, dividing and multiplying all the time. There's order and there's chaos in nature. And there's self-similarity. Some patterns are
repeating across different scales. Thus, some numbers we observe in nature will appear more frequently than others.
So here are the numbers I have either often encountered while developing my theories (both in theory itself and in synchronicity events), during daily operation, or have elsewhere found to be
of elevated significance:
$\displaystyle {13}^{+0}_{-2}, {23}^{+0}_{-1}, {33}^{+0}_{-0}, {43}^{+1}_{-1}, {53}^{+2}_{-2}, {66}^{+3}_{-3}$
These should not be taken as absolute, e.g., 66 here could be observed as 66 × 10-2 but also as part of a ratio (2/3).
In any case, the powers of 10 (which I correlate with vertical energy levels) and the number 3 have elevated significance in the observable universes.
Interestingly, this is something N. Tesla claimed too, which I do not find surprising, given the fact that he could be one of the
past incarnations of my soul.
If these numbers represent discrete states of a system (generally, oscillating one), superpositions of adjacent states may also be relatively common. A superposition is generally most stable [or has a
peak] in the middle - arithmetic mean of adjacent numbers. In example, a superposition of 23 and 33 is:
$\displaystyle {{23 + 33} \over 2} = 28$
Note that deviation in numbers themselves also suggests oscillation and thus probability of superposition. Consider 66±3, it is probably a superposition in the form of average
of 63 and 69 since I did encounter 63 and 69 more often than 64, 65, 67 and 68. The same is true with other numbers. I have encountered 23 more often than 22 but not much more often, so 22 and 23 may
represent discrete states (superposition being 22.5, commonly rounded to 23). Sometimes superposition may be encountered more often than the two discrete states (like in case of 66) but sometimes
it's vice versa. While the average of base states seems to be the most common superposition, other combinations are possible. Apart from 1/2, I find that other common states are 1/3 and 2/3 between
the base states.
Due to increase in global synchronicity, these numbers may be appearing more often in synchronicity events globally.
Interestingly, but unsurprising to me - the initial version of this book had exactly 33 pages after I was finished adding this chapter while the html file itself was 53 KB in size. The PDF generated
from LaTeX had 23 pages.
I often encounter synchronicity when I do some significant updates to my work. For example, after a heavy revision/update on 2023.02.21, the book had 38 pages (33+43 / 2), the html file
was 73 KB in size, generated PDF had 28 pages (23+33 / 2).
After a heavy update on 2023.03.01, the book had 45 pages, the html file was 86 KB (2×43) in size, generated PDF had 33 pages.
Note the prevalence of the number 3. Also note that performing simple mathematical operations on the components of dates can yield more
correlation, e.g., 2023 => 20 + 23 = 43, 02.21 => 02 + 21 = 23. This kind of addition of date components is not arbitrary. I have previously realized that nature sometimes indeed is doing
this, for example, adding days and months together like these units of time have equal value. This may seem to us like adding apples and oranges, but in some natural reference frames it is
not, as I've explained elsewhere.
It should be noted that my experience of synchronicity with numbers usually does not involve and kind of operations performed on them, however, the operations are involved
in this synchronicity because I am talking about such operations in this chapter (rather than numbers alone, both - operations and numbers, are part of the synchronicity event here).
I didn't believe in synchronicity before the transformation of consciousness that I survived in my thirties. But the extensive research, the overwhelming synchronicity I've experienced at the peak
of transformation, and the daily experience of synchronicity that continues to this day, have all convinced me in its reality beyond any doubt.
The numbers are not arbitrary, I have eventually discovered, for example, that these numbers represent ages of physiological transformation in my body/soul:
- the number 3 is correlated with the start of my childhood - that peaked about the age of 6/7 (3 + 10 × 1/3, year 1987/1988, ~350 ppm CO2),
- the number 13 is correlated with the start of my puberty/adolescence (year 1994, ~360 ppm CO2) - that peaked about the age of 16 (13 + 10 × 1/3, year 1997, ~366 ppm CO2),
- the number 22/23 is correlated with the transformation to adulthood started at that age (year 2003, ~375 ppm CO2, this is the year when my son was born and when I was married),
- I have been divorced at the age of 33 (year 2014, ~400 ppm CO2), which was the start of my biggest transformation (re-birth) - one that peaked about the age of 36 (33 + 10 × 1/3),
- I have started experiencing another, albeit smaller, transformation (re-puberty) at the age of 43 (year 2024, ~425 ppm CO2) - which should peak either about the age of 46 (43 + 10 × 1/3), about the age
of 50 (43 + 10 × 2/3), or possibly about the age of 48 (43+53 / 2 = 46+50 / 2) - or, more precisely, about the year of 450 ppm CO2.
Note that one of my transformations started when my son was born. Note now the numbers in the date he was born: 2003.11.23. My home postal number is 43, which is also my shoe number. The pub
I visit most frequently is at number 23 (I believe the number is now even in its name). I could go on, but, obviously, synchronicity is not limited to the state of now, it is correlated
with the past and the future.
Studies show that people in general are experiencing physiological transformations roughly every 10 years and the years of transformations are similar, however, the magnitude is different between
subspecies/individuals. The peak of transformation events may be generally correlated with traumatic or even near death experiences (note that death itself is a transformation event). That, I infer, among
other things, from my own experience. At the peak of my first transformation, when I was 6/7 years of age, I nearly drowned.
Note that N. Tesla also nearly drowned as a youngster.
At the peak of my strongest transformation, when I was about 36/37 years
of age, I have experienced what is commonly diagnosed as nervous breakdown and I've been close to death at least on 3-5 occasions about that time (unrelated to the breakdown itself). At the peak of
my adolescence, about the age of 16, I was closest to suicide. At the peak of my adulthood transformation about the age of 28 I've ended up in hospital with severe stomach pain (the cause remains
unknown, but I have never experienced such stomach pain in my life ever before or after). Even the start of transformation for me is sometimes critical. My adulthood started with me ending up in a
ditch (in a car) and the start of my puberty was similarly dangerous. In fact, the start of the current transformation may be the only one so far without significant trauma (that is, without counting
the very unpleasant double toothache lasting for months) - should I be happy I only feel unhappy this time? What will happen at the peak of my current transformation? Probably a smaller
breakdown, if I don't get struck by an asteroid.
So far, however, despite numerous incidents and close calls, my body never did experience any serious or longer-lasting injury (although I must mention the nasty skin allergy, which, however, may
have been more correlated with my mentality rather than physicality), but the same definitely cannot be said for my soul, which seldom got relief from trying to get out of the pit of
suffering.
I'm not trying hard anymore though, my philosophy has changed. Problems can be solved with force, but also with the absence of force. One can use force and try climbing out of the well (pit) of
suffering potential, or one can simply tunnel through, for the soul has that capability. Tunnelling, however, is usually associated with loss of consciousness (near death experiences) or
death, something one part of my soul seems attracted to. Frequency of consciousness may be altered with meditation. Unless one tunnels far away (which is, on average, unlikely), the tunnelling is a temporary
solution, due to inevitable reincarnation. Another solution is simply to wait for the pit to dissolve, even if it takes multiple incarnations. Here, increasing knowledge helps speeding up the time.
Therefore, it seems that my body will probably survive all the future peaks and transformations (lucky me..). I even believe that the peak of my mental suffering has
passed. As the human world is tumbling down perhaps the pit of suffering will crumble for me as well, as it should for the planet - which is in a transformation event itself. God knows, however, what
exactly is yet to happen to me by the age of death, which I've estimated at about 85 (year 2066).
The early days
I was born on September 1st, 1981 (time 12:30) in a hospital in Slavonski Brod, Croatia, but as a child I've lived in Sibinj, a nearby village where my parents had a home.
Considering my hypotheses on soul-body coupling and evidence for it, it is the place of conception that is important, however, the place of conception is generally very close to the place of
birth. The place of my conception (location at or near Sibinj) is one evidence that my past
incarnations, apart from Tesla, also include I. Newton and J. Christ.
Naturally, I don't remember much of my early childhood, but I do remember things of high impact.
One time my father took me to a nearby lake called Petnja. I have been about 6 or 7 years old. While I was in the water playing with a childhood friend (who was younger than me), my father went
away for a moment to chat with the friend's father. I had that inflatable swimming belt about me, but, during play, somehow it inverted and my head ended up in the water while my legs were up in
the air. The other kid didn't really understand what was happening, he was laughing at his joke and no one suspected there's something wrong. But somehow an older woman lying nearby noticed this
and managed to pull me up before it was too late.
Another thing that left an impression was me getting my first computer - C64. I think I was 8 or 9 years old. I really enjoyed playing games on that thing, but I was most interested in
how these games were made. I was trying to do some programming on it, but the interface it comes with was very basic and limited, so not much could be done.
This changed, perhaps two years later, when my father bought a 386 desktop machine for work. It was love at first boot for me. I don't think he did much work on it, certainly not much compared to
how many hours I've spent coding stuff and playing games.
I have also spent significant portion of my childhood at my grandma's (from mother's side) place. I had good time there, and I'll never forget the plum-filled dumplings grandma used to
make, still the best I ever tasted.
I remember that during a large period of my childhood I really didn't like being photographed. Every time someone would try to take a photo of me I would burst into tears and turn my back on
him. Naturally, there aren't many photos of me during that period and those that do exist don't show my face, only my back. For a long time I couldn't figure out why was I reacting in that way and
what was the meaning of it. But it's clear to me now that this was probably an expression of a crossover instinct - in some of my past lives my soul was in an animal sensitive to light but it
was occasionally exposed to bright flashes of light, someone might have been taking pictures of it, perhaps regularly, and it hurt.
Another interpretation of light sensitivity
2021.06.17
I have another interpretation of this (although both are probably true). Recently, I'm having problems with my eyes while being outside on sunny days. Every time I go out on a sunny day my eyes
start closing and it becomes very hard to use them. Initially, I thought this was related to another issue - a tiny fragment of metal got recently incorporated (or glued) to my
right eye causing eyesight issues, however, since both eyes are affected by the presence of the Sun and considering that I do not have any issues any more while indoors (or outdoors at night) even
when looking at sources of light (such as light bulbs and computer screens), I believe the two phenomena are not strongly related, rather synchronized. I thus consider my childhood fear of exposure
to bright light as a precursor to this, and this as a possible precursor to sensitivity to frequencies of sunlight in a future
incarnation - real homo.sapiens. Considering that this homo.sapiens should be living
in Earth's mantle, and if, as hypothesized, it lives in the dark illuminated solely by bio-luminescence, such precursor is not surprising.
With time, more and more people should be experiencing the same, however, I'm not sure about my own evolution in near future. I might stagnate in human form for a while.
2025.05.02
To make it clear, these problems with my eyes have disappeared after a couple of months.
It should not be uncommon for children to produce such reactions, so if a child reacts unexpectedly to something, it would be good to respect its choice rather than force it to do something
it doesn't like, it will eventually pick up more human-like behavioural characteristics, although it is possible for some instincts to survive even to adulthood.
In case of children however, another possibility exists too - if the radius of the soul of an individual (or, its brain) grows (growth = time-dilated inflation) with the growth of the brain
then, since this radius is correlated with the soul's oscillation frequency, the child might be more mentally entangled with other species - those whose soul radius is equal to the current radius
of the child's soul. Note that this also implies that children are much more mentally entangled with other children of equal age than they are mentally influenced by adults.
Strength of this mental influence should be inversely proportional to distance and difference between soul radii.
Note that the entanglement of the soul and the brain does not imply that the soul is in, or contained within, the brain. It may be localized within the brain area, but it should not be considered
as a part of the brain.
\ch_added
Science of religion and religion of science
Already at young age I was exposed to the worst kind of religion, one propagated by the Roman Catholic Church. I was forced to go to church regularly, mainly due to my grandmother (from
father's side) who was a devoted follower of the cult. But I didn't mind it much then, they made me believe in an absolute almighty god (God) and I didn't see anything wrong in what was being
preached. I took it very seriously so I was regularly praying, trying not to commit sins and when I did I would confess and ask for forgiveness like devoted orthodox Christians do.
At some point, I guess during elementary school, I started questioning all of it and quickly realized what a sham it is. From that point I became agnostic and a growing believer in
mainstream science. However, with the soul transformation at the age of 36-37, similarly was happening with my belief in mainstream science. The more I learned about universes the more I became
disappointed with orthodox science, so in the end I'd have to classify it as scientific religion practised by a scientific cult (it may be using the scientific method, but its main
streams are as narrow and as close-minded as the average cult of Catholics). Having something good exploited to build the foundations (just like the Church exploited Jesus) doesn't make one
non-corruptible, holy or infallible.
I've tried searching for the alternatives to mainstream science but I haven't really found any, especially when it comes to physics. It's all more religion than science, although, I believe, as the
mainstream science is fortifying its religion the alternatives are fortifying their science, or, at least one of them is (my own).
Science and religion grew as one body before they branched into opposites. So there's science in religion and there's religion in science. Once the foundations are set, human science is
evolving science weakly but is strongly evolving religion. Similar is true for the foundations of religion, it evolves weakly but it adapts its interpretations to science, unless it has the power
to deny it.
As long as the science has the power to deny it, it will deny the true alternative and treat it as pseudo-science. Only once it loses its power or choice it will incorporate the alternative into its
foundations and, without any apology or admission of blindness, proceed with a new cycle of fortifying religion.
This is how things work in polarized society. Fake everything as much as possible and resist change as much as possible, even if unconsciously. Truth is allowed to rule for a brief moment only
before it is corrupted or abused for the establishment or re-establishment of some cult.
As I didn't see myself fitting anywhere I had to form my own alternative. In the end, it can be said that I have, in some sense, unified religion and science, because I have, for example, a
definition of a god in my science. In my science/religion, gods are obeying the laws of physics but neither gods nor the laws are absolute. Complete Relativity is my science but I freely admit it is
also my religion - because nothing can be absolutely proven, there will always be truths that cannot be revealed.
The elementary school
Being very calm, extremely introverted and having top grades, I was very different than most kids. That made me a magnet for their frustrations. I was often teased and bullied by those who had
troubles at home.
I felt safest sitting behind the desk during classes so I usually didn't get up during breaks either, although not even that was safe. There was this one guy who would, during breaks, run back and
forth in the classroom, and every time he would pass beside me he would slap me in the back of my head. That didn't hurt a lot, and although it was very annoying, every time he would do
that, I smiled back to him. I remember once I was walking alone in the corridor, I saw a kid coming from the other direction, he was a known troublemaker, as he passed me he hit me in the stomach as
hard as he could. I was left without air for a while but I just continued walking, bent in pain and with tears in my eyes.
There was only one time, when I was in trouble, that someone stepped in to save me - it was an older kid. More than 10 years later, the same kid, now grown man, was employed by my dad to work on
carpentry. For a month or two I was also employed there. Seeing how good and hard working this man was, I thought he should have a greater salary, so I asked my parents to increase it. And they
did. This had nothing to do with the fact he saved me from pain ten years ago - that would be wrong and that was not in my mind at the time, he deserved more money. But ain't it interesting, how
karma works?
Some time later, this man drowned at the same lake and very close to [if not at] the same spot I almost drowned as a kid.
I wasn't saved by luck then, what happened to me can be interpreted as a relative precursor to his drowning. I's like I've marked the spot where he (or someone) would drown. In fact, I have realized
that most of my experiences are precursors to correlated events in the future that will be experienced by others.
People usually say one should fight back bullies, but that was impossible for me, I didn't like fighting and hurting others, and now that I believe in karma, I am glad I did not.
Most of these kids were probably punished at home even before they punished me.
Look at Earth - did Earth react when people started abusing it? No, it took a lot of years for a karmic reaction, but it is here and it will be huge. But also not by Earth's conscious
intention to destroy people (although Earth does have consciousness) - it will be a reaction of Earth's immune system.
UPDATE 2023.02.07
Things got very interesting today as I was reading Newton's biography. On page 59 there is a story
saying how Newton got kicked hard in the belly once when he was in elementary school. Newton, however, later challenged the boy to a fight and beat him. This was the only time Newton got into
a fight. Now my own story makes sense to me. I know why it had to happen, I know why I didn't react and, again, I'm glad I didn't. It's time to end that karma.
This is not the only situation that I found myself in and which I share with Newton, however, I generally didn't react the same (or, I didn't react at all). This is how one evolves - reacting
differently when history repeats itself (if one has to evolve).
I see great similarity between my childhood behaviour and the behaviour of Jesus but I didn't talk like Jesus the prophet at the time. I was talking/behaving like a prophet for a relatively brief
period of my life about the age of 36-37 at the peak of my consciousness transformation. Obviously, any current incarnation is a superposition of past and future incarnations, this includes personalities and experiences - which
cannot be absolutely the same but very low relativity can exist between them. Every superposition is relative however, and this one is spread across the lifetime.
High school
At the end of the elementary school I was fed up with the abuse and I saw high-school as an opportunity to change this, so I made a conscious decision to stop studying so much. I decided to
decrease grades and try to hide my differences in order not to get abused. So that's what I did.
Based on my grades from elementary, my parents wanted me to enter the best school available. But since I had a plan to fail, I wanted to go to a school that will not be the worst but not the
best one either. So I signed up for technical school. Parents didn't argue much because this was still a good school and if I would have good grades I shouldn't have a problem entering
college later.
But instead of caring for grades, at this point, I was more into things that I was really interested in. I was usually studying only as much as needed not to fail the class and I even started
making fun of teachers which was well received by other kids. Being introverted, this was not easy for me to do, but I still felt I had no choice but to do it. No one realized I was faking
stupidity and I wasn't going back to real me. I couldn't believe it, but people, including my parents, were actually associating high grades with high intelligence - they thought I just got dumber
after elementary school. But even though I wasn't studying much, on occasion I would get a high grade from mathematics or something similar - subjects for which I didn't really have to learn much
to know.
This was confusing to others, including teachers. I remember once I got a top grade, the teacher accused me of cheating and I had to take the test again, but not on paper this time, rather
on board in front of her. Reluctantly, she confirmed my grade as deserved.
I might have solved the problem of abuse, bud I didn't solve the problem of suffering. I could never be happy faking things and my parents were very hard on me because of low grades and
expression of this behaviour. Often, when my parents would pick me up after school, my father always had some place, some meeting to go, before we would go home. He would park the car somewhere and
say he would be back in 5 minutes or so. It never was 5 minutes, it was always a couple of hours. My mother didn't complain, I guess because dad was earning good money at the time. She was used to
it and always had something to read with her. But this was very hard for me, all I wanted after school was to get home and do what I actually wanted to do. But I didn't complain either, I almost
never did. My sister was rarely with us in this kind of situations.. probably because she would complain a lot.
But if I don't complain that does not mean I'm ok with it - I just don't like to complain, for the same reason I do not like to fight. Regardless, my parents didn't show much care for my
feelings, especially now that my grades were below their expectations.
Being extremely introverted, when I would be out with friends, I usually had to drink a lot in order to relax and be able to participate in social (extroverted) interactions. I had a long hair and
occasionally someone would call me Jesus, based on my appearance I guess.
Things I liked to do
During high-school, things I enjoyed, more or less, were listening and playing music, hanging out with friends and computer games. But what I was really passionate about was computer
programming. Very early on, I was into cracking - making patches, keygens and similar stuff. Although I was a member of few cracking groups, social interaction eventually always becomes a burden
for me (probably because extroverted people prevail in society) so I generally worked alone. That's how it was for most of my life and that's how I still work now.
Cracking (reverse-engineering of software) and programming was indeed a true passion - glued to the screen I would often skip lunch ignoring the pain in the stomach, and my sleeping habits often
resembled those of a bat. Sometimes I ate my lunch in the evening, sometimes next morning. Even when I did ate, I never ate much, just enough for survival. Needless to say, I was
very skinny but I had no health issues related to this. It was not uncommon for me to sleep with my head on a school desk whenever that was possible.
Cracking held my attention for a while but, after a few years I've found the topic exhausted - there was nothing interesting left to learn. At that point I was already experimenting with
websites - I had my own website where I was publishing my cracks, computer games and apps. I remember once I've developed a shareware application which got distributed with a well-known computer
magazine, but at the same time I've published a keygenerator for the same application.
My support for piracy is conditional. I would pay for software I use and art I enjoy, but it's not the crime to enjoy it when one does not have the money to pay for it. Copying or cloning of data
is not stealing and it doesn't harm the author if one doesn't have the money to pay for it anyway, in fact, the author can still benefit even from such usage due to potential free promotion.
Creating and maintaining a website was not challenging enough on its own. I had to include hacking into the equation. So as I was decreasingly cracking software I was increasingly hacking into
computer networks and this includes breaking into major ISP's and hosting providers. Of course, I didn't do much damage, it was all done for the excitement and learning. I did host some software on
these servers but I tried not to exceed bandwidth of users whose accounts I've used (on one occasion I failed at this and found it very embarrassing so I soon stopped hacking).
Before the transformation about the age of 36-37 I did not like to share my knowledge. I invested a lot of time to discover and learn everything I knew, I guess I felt pride and wasn't interested in
sharing anything so easily - it didn't feel right to me for someone to learn in 5 minutes a solution to a problem that took me months to discover. That, besides introversion, is why I declined
any request for sharing or cooperation. Of course, it's obvious to me now that any such person is a hypocrite and if we would all have to start from the start, at some point noone would
ever learn anything new. Enforcement of copyrights and patents is only dragging down the society.
After high-school, my interest for cracking and hacking was soon gone, but my passion for programming remained.
Love stories and relationships
At the end of high-school, the class travelled to Lorret de Mar, a coastal town in Catalonia, as part of our last high-school excursion. I never was in a relationship before, but I had strong
feelings for one girl from the class for quite some time now. And since this was probably my last chance to do something about it, somehow I managed to ask her out. We went to a local bar near the
beach and sat by the table in the back. She was sitting opposite to me. I believe we were drinking tequila, and even so, it took some time for the first kiss, perhaps because she had to initiate
it, as up to that point I had no experience and was still shy about her. She put a lemon in her mouth and suggested me to take a bite, so that's how our first French kiss started. After we were
done, all people in the bar started cheering and clapping hands looking at us. Confused, we looked at the bartender and he said we were kissing for half an hour. It was some kind of a
record I guess. Of course, we were not under the impression it was that long. Smiling, we left the bar and started walking by the beach. Sure enough, there was a guy with roses, and soon
enough, I was a guy buying roses, for her. Hugged, we continued to an old castle by the sea and sat on a staircase there beneath the open sky, looking at the sea. The night was calm. At one
point, she fell asleep in my lap. Everything was perfect.. a moment for forever. Some time later my leg started to hurt and soon went numb. But I couldn't do anything, I didn't want to disturb her
and wake her up. A couple of hours later she woke up. It took a while before I could walk again, she felt sorry, but I don't remember the pain I remember love, the happiness I felt. Some might
say I sacrificed myself here, but there is no sacrifice in true love, where all such pain has no choice but to be imaginary. Sacrifice is real when one remembers pain and has no choice but to
forget love. This love was not to forget, and even though we broke up a couple of years later, I had no regrets, apart from me being stupid enough to break it. But that's how it had to
be. I eventually got married with someone else and she did too.
I spent 10 years in marriage with a woman I thought I loved but the relationship ended up being a complicated mess. It's strange, but as much as I could hate that woman for what I had to go
through in the end, I think I actually love her more now that we're not together. I love her as a mother of my child and as someone who provided me the experience (even if traumatic) that heavily
contributed to the eventual transformation of my self.
But these two relationships are a good example of karmic actions and reactions. In the first one, my love was at first surprised I want to be with her - other girls were interested in me and she
thought she was not good enough for me, that I will get bored with her eventually. I thought that was nonsense and it was very obvious I wasn't interested in anyone but her. But two years later
that's what has happened. Some time later I wanted us to get together again but she needed time, we went out of sync in our feelings and it didn't happen. In my second relationship, at the beginning I was
now acting somewhat surprised and I told my wife she will leave me eventually. I didn't really know why I said that, but she thought that was nonsense. It was indeed obvious she was only interested
in me at the time, but ten years later, that's what happened. Some time later she wanted us to get back together again but I needed time, we went out of sync in our feelings and it failed.
My parents did not approve my 1st relationship, because of religious differences, or at least that's what they said. I was a forced Roman catholic and she was of a religion typically associated
with our neighbouring country - one we were at war with recently. They were concerned what people would say if we would get married. I couldn't understand that - how can someone's opinion be more
important than our happiness? Of course I ignored their opinion and that was just another moment when a certain amount of feelings was lost for my parents.
During my education, my mother was always concerned with my grades due to a fear of wasting money and talent, while my father was concerned with how my grades affect his pride and
reputation. They didn't have much if any interest in my feelings. So, naturally, a lot of my feelings for them was lost over the years. They did care for me very well, but they didn't really love
and respect my nature, at least not for the first half of my life - from my point of view. There are at least two sides to every story, however, and even if I'm not now like my parents were back
then, when I was polarized there were times when I was expressing exactly the same behaviour I didn't like in them. So, even if I don't like it, I can understand it. People transform to some degree
roughly every 10 years, some more some less, but I guess everyone at some point starts questioning how they could have done this or that when they were younger. Should I blame myself for being
something different in the past? I could, but what's the point? It doesn't seem like I had much choice anyway. We certainly can't change history, and if we don't want history to drag our
advancement into future, we should not cultivate regrets, rather appreciate the learning experience and accept what was as what simply had to be. The experience of our bad selves leads to better
understanding of bad selves in general. We all grow and decay various selves, or parts of selves, during our lives. Does a tree have a choice what branch, where and how much, to grow? The answer
will depend on the frame of reference. Thus, I may not like some behaviour of my parents or other people, past or present, but it doesn't feel right to overly blame them and it certainly doesn't
seem right to judge them from the point of reference that forms my perspective. In fact, the I of now could never be a judge, just a messenger.
The university
After finishing high-school in 1999, I wanted to go to a university, more precisely FER (Faculty of Electrical Engineering and Computing) in Zagreb. This was one of the most prestigious faculties
in Croatia so it was really hard to get in with low grades from high-school. I also didn't prepare the best I could for the admission tests so, naturally, at first try I didn't make it. I began
university at the Faculty of Mechanical Engineering in Slavonski Brod instead (my father has a Master's degree in Mechanical Engineering but I don't think that influenced my choice). I have finished
the first year of courses there but this was not what I wanted so I tried to get into FER again, and this time I succeeded.
Eventually I got married (in year 2003) and started working officially so the faculty was not a priority. It took me 10 years to finish and attain a Master's degree in Computer Science and Engineering (this
was year 2011). During my time there, every year I would often choose more courses for a year than I was obliged, so in the end I had more ECTS points than people usually have. I wasn't interested
in points but I was interested in science/physics, some of the courses I chose were Physics of Materials (in other words, Quantum Mechanics) and Deterministic Chaos, which I thought would be
helpful in understanding the Universe (at that time I still believed in absolute universe).
However, at this time of my life I still wasn't devoting much time to science, I was still pretty much concerned with programming. But I did continuously track what was happening in the world of
science and was occasionally reading existing theories in physics although I didn't understand much at the time. Deep down I knew that I'll never be happy limiting myself to programming for the
rest of my life so this interest could be understood as a precursor to the passion for science.
The Terran boy = the Terran planet
My son was born on 2003.11.23. For me, this was a perfect child. I don't remember him ever crying much or complaining, even when injured. Maybe he did not have much to complain about but he
deserved all the attention considering the purity radiating from his soul, so easy to love. Even before my later transformation, I have often associated him with Earth, myself with Mars and
his mother with Venus. During the marriage, we even had a pet dog called Luna. All this made even more sense through my later research.
As we got separated, the boy - now 10 years old, was alternating homes, spending one day with his mother, the other with me. This was going on for a couple of years, and even though I don't think
this daily rotation was especially hard on him, I think everybody felt this was some kind of an undesirable status quo that's going to be resolved sooner or later, one
way or the other. I call these times the Age of confusion. This was somewhat resolved when I got a job 200 km away (up to that point I was working from home), when I started seeing the boy
only on weekends. But after my nervous breakdown (transformation of consciousness), the system and my ex-wife turned even more hostile towards me. As much as I missed my son, I realized I had
to let go and give up seeing him regularly (not because I was a problem for him, but because others were making problems out of it and it was affecting him). He is a grown man now (aged almost 22 at
the time I'm updating this) and we're now used to being apart. I am sure he's fine with that, as I am fine with that now, but something has been lost.
The jobs, works, and prophecies
I have earned my first money at the time of high-school. It wasn't much but it was earned remotely, over internet, something still uncommon at the time (money was coming by regular mail in the form
of cheques which I regularly had difficulties cashing in as local banks weren't accustomed to this). My first serious work started some time during faculty and after I got married. I have worked
for a couple of years as a freelancer, and, while I was very successful, this was very stressful and not rewarding enough so I gave up eventually to work on my own projects.
Even though I was married, I still worked most of the time I was at home, regularly exhausting myself. So this was not a typical marriage, especially because I was still working alone (my wife had
no interest in computers anyway). At first my wife objected mostly because I worked a lot and yet I wasn't earning money. But I believed in my work and my self. My most successful project was
a search engine for files hosted on file sharing services, which at its peak was among 3000 most popular sites in the world and was worth millions.
I had other successful projects, but it all became too stressful and, eventually, I have lost motivation for this kind of work. So about the age of 35, as I was beginning to transform, I decided to
shut everything down.
Up to the age of 36, all the money I have earned was earned from home. A interpret that as a relative precursor to most people working remotely. First, during pandemics, but later, full time.
I still had to earn money, so I applied for and got a job at the IT department of the national library, NSK (Nacionalna i Sveučilišna Knjižnica) in Zagreb. I found a small apartment in Zagreb and
started working in February, 2017.
Although the IT department was, unsurprisingly, in a basement (while I liked the British IT Crowd show, you'd expect the respect for IT would be higher in the 21st century), the place was not a bad
place for work.
People were very nice and, apparently, they had bad experience with programmers in the past. I took the job seriously, however, so they actually begged me not to leave. And while I did not
want to disappoint them, somehow I knew, someday I will.
While I was working in Zagreb, as soon as I could, perhaps 3 out of 4 weekends, I was travelling back to Sibinj just so I could see my son who was now living mostly at his mother's or
grandmother's house. During these visits I was staying at my parents' house.
At this point, programming was an exhausted subject for me and I wasn't passionate about it anymore, but a physicist in me was certainly waking up. I would spent a lot of time thinking about the
universe and very soon I started working on Complete Relativity and related works. This was the Age of transformation.
For as long as I knew myself I've had this skin allergy. Its symptoms were reddish itching circles on the skin. A couple of times I have asked doctors to help with my allergy. They couldn't tell
what I was allergic to and they could only prescribe some generic pills. It was very annoying so I tried to discover myself what it is but without success. I was just adding stuff I'm not allergic
to to the list - it was not seasonal so I was not allergic to pollen, I ruled out food, fabric, fabric softeners, detergents, shampoos and pretty much everything physical.
Even before I started working in Zagreb, I have noticed some psychological transformation was happening to me. This only intensified in Zagreb. I was constantly experiencing the events
of synchronicity and guidance to problem solutions. I was often working on one problem, couldn't solve it, be guided to concentrate on something else and then find the solution there.
One day somehow I was under the impression that I need a particular plant for an experiment. I was in the middle of the town and I really had no idea where I could find it so by tomorrow I forgot
about it.
The next day, for some reason I decided to go driving - I did not know where I was going, randomly turning left and right, I finally arrived at a hill in front of the woods.
I liked woods so I parked the car and started following the path into the woods. The atmosphere was great there and the walk was really enjoyable. I didn't walk far, when I saw the plant by
the road - the one I was looking for two days ago.
But I didn't pick up the plant, I didn't know what I'm supposed to do with it. Only now I see, the experiment started a couple of days ago and ended with me finding the plant.
Then one day I noticed I don't feel hunger any more, this lasted 10 days for sure, maybe even two weeks. I didn't change anything physically, I was still going to work as usual, so it was
baffling to me why I didn't feel any need for food. I forced my self to eat a small piece of toast every day because I thought that I may be sick even though I didn't feel sick.
Later, I realized this fasting period is probably common about the time one is experiencing a major transformation of consciousness. Note that lack of appetite is also common just before
death. The two events are highly correlated.
The allergy however was raging and one day during that time I decided to start ignoring it no matter how hard it would itch. At one point I found myself naked and meditating.
The next day, allergy was gone and didn't return for the next 4 years.
After one year of working in Zagreb I was thinking of quitting the job so I could fully concentrate on Complete Relativity and the Solar System analysis.
I was sick of life in the city and the stress it was creating - hearing the yelling of neighbours upstairs and their dog running through their apartment, the sirens, the crowds and
traffic. Everything seemed so unnecessary yet always so present. I took a month of vacation, left the apartment for good and moved back to Sibinj.
I wasn't planning to go back to work but I realized I wasn't ready to quit and after a month I had to go back. I went straight to work. I didn't have the apartment anymore and I did not want to
search for another one. So after work, I just drove to the nearby mountain, found a nice place where I parked and stayed for the night. It was far from traffic and far from people, I felt great
and I didn't want to leave. I figured if I stay here I could afford to see my kid more often, I'm gonna be more healthy and free of slaving to the apartment. So, pretty quickly, it was easily
decided that this will be my place of residence in Zagreb from now on.
There was a spring nearby with a fresh cold water where I would refresh myself every morning before work, the neighbourhood in the wild was alive, friendly and pleasant and non-intrusive, the
living room was open and enormous and I could urinate in it without having to aim and flush precious water. And even though it was not so comfortable sleeping in the car for the
first 6 months, I had a clear view of the stars while lying down. This was heaven compared to apartments and I soon started wondering what the hell is wrong with the world - they're destroying this
so they could build apartments and get even more sick?
I often imagined the town being destroyed by earthquakes and I felt strong desire for that to happen - because it was causing stress for people, for all life on Earth and Earth itself.
The place where I lived was quite elevated (I later realized it's exactly 666 metres from the sea level) so the winter was harsh at times. But I always loved winter and its atmosphere. Though my
body was freezing at times, the energy, the sounds and everything - it was magical.
And, for the same reason I didn't feel I was sacrificing my leg on that romantic night in Lorret de Mar, the cold weather here couldn't hurt this love at all.
Staying at that place where I was isolated from people, surely had to affect my soul, and could be one of the reasons why my allergy stayed away.
However, I knew one day I'm gonna quit my job and this will end.
Over time I have realized that the root of evil for me on this world is in the government so eventually I decided to quit supporting it. I didn't renew the registration of my car, but I knew I
will be pulled over eventually so I decided this will be the day when I quit my job.
Finally, one Friday, 2019.03.22, while I was driving to Sibinj, the terrorists in blue tried to stop me. I wasn't driving very fast, but it was a long straight road and, normally, I was driving
a bit over the limit. A blue terrorist ambushed me waving frantically with his stick implying that I should pull over and stop so he can take my money.
I was really annoyed by these people, I knew they're just another form of tax collectors, so I ignored his request and just continued on my way. I wasn't trying to escape, I think I even slowed
down a little.
Some time later, a police car with its bells and whistles rushed behind me. I ignored them again, I just wanted to go home to see my son.
At times they would go into the lane beside me and wave frantically trying to make me stop. Finally, I arrived into a small city (Nova Gradiška) and had to stop on a zebra crossing. They took the
opportunity and forced me to park and get out of the car. At first they acted angry but I started yelling at them immediately. This was strange, because I never yelled in public before. They were
shocked, they obviously weren't used to such a reaction from someone who is not a criminal - they've surely checked my info before they pulled me over. I told them the uprising will come and that
they will have to chose whose side they're going to be on - the people or the system. The guy who was writing a ticket was so scared he was shivering. He asked me to take down my license
plates, but I refused and he began taking them down himself. Being shocked and all, this wasn't so easy for him, so eventually I ripped the plate off and threw it away.
It took some time for them to write the statement and all, but after they were done I just took it all along with my government issued ID and threw it into a trash-can beside them.
I had no plans to use or renew my ID anyway. From now on, I am not a number, I am a free man, or so I thought. Most would interpret my behaviour at the time as schizophrenic, but I see it now as
prophetic.
I drove home and never returned to the job in Zagreb again.
On Sunday, 2020.03.22, exactly 1 year after I left, a strong devastating earthquake hit Zagreb. The epicentre was just a kilo-metre away from my residence 666. I'm still waiting for
the big one though - one with the epicentre at that place.
As I'm sure I've mentioned elsewhere already, I'm not a killer or destroyer. Like Earth, I am generally a creator. I understand that people might die during earthquakes, but I don't wish for death
explicitly, I wish for everyone to get what they deserve (karma). If people would build buildings that don't harm the Earth they wouldn't have to worry about earthquakes harming them or destroying
their homes.
Chapter The return of allergy updated.
The return of allergy = the return of humanity
After 4 years, the allergy was back. One might say I was never even cured from it because allergies do tend to disappear from time to time. I disagree. Something deep had happened to keep me
free from it for 4 years - there were times before when it would go away, but it was never for this long, it was never more than a year if it ever was a full year.
Eventually I started noticing that alcohol has a positive effect - every time I got drunk symptoms disappeared (by the time of hangover) and only started appearing slowly the next day, increasing
in intensity as I was getting sober. This was very interesting because I was told that alcohol has a negative effect on allergies.
While I was working on CR, I have managed to define what a soul is, and how big and where the Earth's soul was. By analogy, I have found that the location of the human soul [or at least the soul
of the human brain] is within the conarium (pineal gland) at the centre of the brain.
Again, it should be noted that the two are relatively sharing space - conarium is not a vital organ and removal of conarium is unlikely to result in (be synchronized with) soul de-localization.
Its radius is oscillating so it must be absorbing and emitting radiation of certain scale.
The radius of the soul is correlated with its energy level, which differs between species (during reincarnations between different species the soul is changing its vertical energy level), but for
individuals of the same species it is roughly the same, so these individuals are in resonance and their souls exchange information through channels of entanglement (during changes/fluctuations in
that entanglement).
Unlike other parts of the brain, the conarium is not separated from the blood and CSF (cerebro-spinal fluid) by the blood-brain barrier - it is suspended in a mixture of blood and CSF.
So conarium can be affected by whatever it is in the blood (e.g., alcohol) and the entangled part of the soul (e.g., radius) may be affected accordingly.
If the soul's radius is increased it will slow down time for the individual, if it is decreased it will accelerate time - but not only that, with the change in oscillation frequency the individual
will get out of resonance with other individuals of the species.
This is how I found the source of my allergy - humanity. When I'm drunk, my soul is out of sync with polarized humans and cannot be influenced by them. Thus, my immune system doesn't react
- there is no damage usually caused by polarized humanity.
I have been saying, very often, that humanity makes me sick. Now I know that was literally true all along.
Of course, allergic reactions are reactions to specific antigens (allergens) so this must be synchronized with the exposure of the immune system to specific proteins.
Since I was not able to identify the allergen it is most likely a part of a locally produced protein, and the production of this protein was mentally induced.
The cure
I never was an alcoholic nor I could ever enjoy being constantly drunk so I had to find a proper cure. That might mean the humanity will have to go away or I'm gonna have to
isolate myself from it - unless this is a temporary fluctuation of the soul from a stable energy level where the soul is immune to polarization. A level my soul was elevated to 4 years ago.
However, as ionic content of blood affects the polarized component of the soul, the solution could be in the change of blood pH factor.
The alcohol, affecting kidneys, for example, indirectly affects the concentration of phosphate ions which usually balance ions of other minerals (salts). By this and other mechanisms, the alcohol
indirectly affects the pH factor of blood (usually making it more acidic). But pH within cells is even more affected (towards even more acidity), and larger pH difference across cell membranes is
larger electrical polarization. This can now be correlated with soul polarization. Clearly I do become more polarized (and thus more social) when drinking. During hangover, however, the electrical
polarization can get lower (pH can even increase beyond normal). I have previously hypothesized that soul strongly couples to the blood type. If electric polarization of blood is
mirrored (synchronized) with the electric polarization of the soul (likely anti-hydrogen ion equivalents of smaller scale) - then it will affect the resonance.
It might not affect the frequency of oscillation significantly but, with the reduction in voltage, it should reduce the intensity (power) of absorbed radiation - making the organism effectively
less sensitive to mental radiation of other individuals.
This reduction in signal power subdues and, upon reaching certain threshold, even eliminates the reaction of the immune system and subsequent production of allergic symptoms. Note, however, that
apart from power, appropriate change in frequencies could produce a similar effect.
I have also previously hypothesized that real homo.sapiens has more acidic blood. While that should be valid
for homo.sapiens.polarized it might not be true for homo.sapiens.neutralum. In any case, this doesn't imply that polarization is higher, it's probably lower for both (lower difference between
cellular and extracellular pH).
In conclusion, the 4 year long absence of allergy in my case should be correlated with one, more, or most likely all of these in synchronization (synchronicity):
- change in difference between cellular and extracellular pH (allergy returns when this difference is the same as it is in people on average),
- decrease in density of mental radiation of homo.beta.polarized (for almost a year I was living on the mountain, in isolation, and while my job was in the city, it was in the basement),
- change in the soul's energy level, affecting its dipole in a way it became more sensitive to radiation of other, still polarized but, non-cancerous species.
Proper visualization during meditation can change the voltage between blood and cells, so one should be able to block the allergy through meditation, although meditation likely can't induce
permanent changes unless one can meditate while doing other stuff, like some animals probably can.
Radiation on one scale is generally preceded by radiation of smaller scale in synchronicity (phase shift exists due to scale difference). Thus, one's brain might not be emitting and absorbing
radiation at the soul's scale but also at the standard electro-magnetic scale.
Since conarium is embedded in blood/CSF, due to presence of hydrogen ions, all it takes to generate electro-magnetic pulses is for the liquid with ions to periodically rotate about the conarium.
This is exactly what happens during rinse cycles where CSF and blood in the brain exchange periodically. So each life form, or at least those with a brain, generate changing electric and magnetic
fields in the central region, likely aligned with Earth's magnetic field.
Each such organism is at some level aware of this field. If it's not used for navigation, then it certainly could be used for communication.
If cancerous mental radiation can cause allergy could it cause other diseases?
In my case, it was allergy, but different organisms have different reactions, I am convinced the decrease in quality of mental radiation can be synchronized even with cancer development.
If, for example, one finds itself smoking less in wilderness one might want to ask its self "why am I smoking less here and could it be correlated with the quality of mental radiation?".
I, for example, do not generally smoke cigarettes and drink alcohol at home, but I generally always smoked cigarettes and drank every time I was in a pub among other people.
Thus, I recommend everyone who feels sick to try isolation in the wild for a while, it may make one more appreciate the wilderness and, consequently, one's true self, instead of that image one is
forced to project every day to satisfy the sick mentality.
One day after I wrote this chapter, I have noticed my allergy receded, it was at least 75% gone. Fascinating.
If this was not a result of sudden decrease in absorbed negative mental radiation (unlikely), then it should be a result of my organism fixing the problem - probably by regulating blood
pH level which is also mirrored in soul depolarization.
Remember that an organism is always a symbiosis of smaller organisms and also a symbiosis of a soul with a body composed of organisms. I also haven't smoked for 10 days, apart from 2 cigarettes
yesterday. But now I decided to quit smoking as it is highly likely that it harms animals in my body (perhaps if I didn't smoke these 2 cigarettes, the allergy would be 100% gone).
This is all synchronized.
Note that this does not mean smoking is now forbidden for me - I find it wrong to force my self to quit smoking absolutely. There are no absolute poisons, and this too likely has some benefits
in small doses, and at certain occasions - even if it shortens my life. Shortening of life is not always bad, I find it bad to force people to live long or short.
In my case, to quit smoking is to quit doing it automatically - renouncing the need but with no sacrifice of the will. I'll smoke if I really want to, not because I need to.
Of course, that's easy to say but hard to do if the mental strength deflates. In general, needs correlate highly with mental weakness (decreased self-awareness) and diseases. Smoking 1 cigarette
out of need is much worse than smoking 10 out of want. Thus, I "have to" wish for my mentality to remain strong before I wish for another cigarette.
It seems apparent that, once one becomes aware of its self (soul), how its organism is organized and how it works but also how the disease works, it becomes possible to cure the organism from that
disease simply by contemplating the process.
Meditation shows that, regarding the metabolism, one can induce changes simply by wishing for them through appropriate visualization. My case implies that it is not necessary to fully dedicate
yourself to meditation, it can be done
on the fly by dedicating only a small amount of resources to these tasks.
Note that some animals, such as dolphins, birds and whales, can put some parts of their brain to sleep while they are doing ordinary daily tasks.
Time will tell whether the effects are temporary, like in case of conventional meditation.
However, I am sure this can be permanent, albeit with an important requirement for this - the organisms living inside one must be effectively aware of importance of their host to them so they
work in a sustainable way for mutual benefit rather than for their own selfish short-term interests which would eventually destroy both.
And since
the collective inside is a reflection of the collective one is externally part of, one
cannot expect these organisms to keep it healthy if one works against its own host organism (Earth).
It is also not enough for one to stop being selfish itself and stop directly harming the host, one needs to also stop supporting those who harm it.
Note that this might not work if forced (at least not in the long-term). I came into this state naturally by learning, truly understanding and truly believing in such mechanics of
universes. I certainly do wish it works for everyone.
UPDATE 2021.06.09:
A couple of hours from that moment I decided to quit smoking in order not to harm creatures inside my body, the symptoms of allergy were 100% gone.
I am amazed and I feel like we're finally at the verge of truly understanding each other.
So here I am healing my self with thoughts alone and people out there call me crazy and consider insane for contemplating that my soul was once inside the bodies of Jesus and Newton, while at the
same time they don't even know where their own soul is, let alone how it works. Some even doubt they have a soul.
It's a good thing then that I decided to listen people inside my head and my body instead of these lunatics. I will never regret that.
Finally, it feels good to be introverted.
I am aware though, that, due to general oscillation, it is possible this allergy will be back again, but if it does it will be for shorter and shorter periods of time and of lower
intensity (some guys inside my body might still doubt my good intentions and it is possible I might still harm them in some way, but that should not be a problem now that we can
communicate, if I do something wrong they can show me some symptoms and I should figure it out).
The current absence of allergy then could be interpreted as a precursor of a complete cure, but I have no doubt that I will be cured in the end, if I am not already.
In any case, if one wants to cure itself from a disease, one shouldn't take pills and block the symptoms - one is then blocking communication and further alienating its self
from its people and understanding of the organism, while at the same time becoming more dependent on external, more complicated and more expensive, care (maintenance).
That only leads to more and more diseases, more complicated and expensive life for one. No pharmacy can understand one's organism nor cure it better than one can itself.
Of course, if one is polarized and addicted to external medicine and pharmacy, this won't be easy, but the key is in mental transformation.
We have all been trained to care for things, people and creatures of external reality. The irony is, this distancing from internal reality of our bodies and our selves is making us less able to
truly feel love and care for both external and internal, it forces us to fake it in an automated way. Thus, the care and love become more and more superficial while intelligence becomes more and
more artificial.
Modern medicine might tell one that cells and proteins in the body are dumb machines, at least on individual level. That's because modern polarized man is able to measure extroverted
intelligence only. But one's cells and proteins are extremely introverted organisms. Their introverted intelligence can be extremely high. It is not surprising then that they can be mentally
influenced - for introverted organisms, reality is mental.
UPDATE 2021.12.23:
Just as predicted, the allergy has returned on couple occasions with much lower intensity, posing no problems. Not only that, it was becoming weaker with each new occasion and I strongly feel this
won't be a problem any more. I consider my self completely depolarized now, and therefore, completely cured.
UPDATE 2023.02.21:
Just confirming that allergy was completely gone and didn't return after I wrote the above. Won't be posting any more updates on this unless it comes back which is not impossible but I believe it
requires another soul transformation that would induce higher polarization.
On subconsciousness and internal regulation
Consciousness has an unlimited number of sublevels, but it is impossible to be aware of all of them. Effectively, one is thus effectively generally limited to only a couple of sublevels.
Subconsciousness is responsible for various tasks which, from the perspective of consciousness, are automated - with the amount of determinism proportional to the depth of subconsciousness.
Shallow levels of subconsciousness are those one uses in externally expressed routines.
For example, consider the task of computer programming. One may write the code only to satisfy the required functionality with no regard to its security and may or may not choose to fix the
security holes later.
But one may also write secure code from the start. This, however, requires additional thinking during the coding. This thinking may occur on a conscious level but with experience it will become
more and more automated, becoming a part of subconscious routines.
Somewhat deeper levels of subconsciousness regulate internal functions of the body, such as the metabolism. As evidence shows, these may be accessed and altered during meditation.
But what if it is possible to store this ability of meditation on some subconscious level as a routine and make it run on that level during daily life operation?
This is exactly what I believe I have accomplished curing my allergy - on some sublevel, a routine for alternative blood pH regulation was stored and runs periodically [or synchronized
with some signal] to overwrite the default routine.
This state may also be achievable by taking stronger psychoactive substances (e.g., ayahuasca, psilocybin). I, however, have no experience with such substances, but I am convinced one needs to attain a
deeper understanding of nature and mechanics of universes for any permanent changes to be induced in the organism.
After I did some research on ayahuasca, it appears that transformation and other phenomena I have been experiencing starting from age 36 are similar to effects of ayahuasca (spiritual
awakening, soul rebirth, communication with non-human intelligence, ...).
This clearly shows that attaining knowledge of universes can affect the brain in profound ways. Obviously, one must go beyond the current knowledge of mainstream physics to achieve
such state.
However, it is likely not enough to
learn this knowledge in conventional way, rather one must attain and experience it similar to the way I did. If that is true, learning about universes
should be synchronized with changes in personality.
I have attained this
higher state of being through development of
Complete Relativity and
I interpret this as yet another evidence that its postulates and hypotheses on nature and mechanics of universes are indeed correct.
Perhaps that feeling of non-belonging to this world that followed me from my early days has now validated itself and it was meant to encourage me to search for my world inside rather than outside
of my being.
So, hopefully [for the development of god at least], no one will believe the [more convincing] prediction we made applying scientific method...
\ch_added
Message decrypted
As I've mentioned already, I was much bothered by the date 2018.07.01 (July 1st, 2018). Why did I insist that the world (or my life) will end on that particular date and why did I pronounce
it publicly? I knew there must be a deeper meaning behind it even if the date was wrong. I've tried to crack it multiple times but to no avail. And then, on Good Friday, 2023.04.07, it all suddenly
made sense.
According to my hypotheses on reincarnation, traumatic experiences of past incarnations are commonly re-experienced (to some degree). I also believe there's good probability that one of past
incarnations of my soul was J. Christ. On 2018.07.01 I was exactly 36 years and 10 months old. Assuming that Jesus died at the same age, subtracting this age from the date of his death (33.04.03) one
obtains a date of birth at the very beginning of June, 5 BC. I believe thus that the Jesus was born on -5.06.03 or a couple (2-3) of days before/after. The fact that I've figured this out
on Good Friday (when crucifixion and death of Jesus is commemorated) reveals a signal further suggesting that this is indeed the correct interpretation of my peculiar apocalyptic rant near
the end of my transformation. Of course, this alone cannot be considered as strong evidence for Jesus' birth date. However, the obtained year 5 BC is certainly convincing. All things considered, this
is the most likely year of Jesus' birth.
Not only is the year convincing, the whole date is, as it is in agreement with the appearance of the
most likely candidate for the star of Bethlehem, an astronomical object - that some interpret as nova explosion, observed between -5.03.10 and -5.04.07, and which was visible for over 70 days (but not
much more, assuming it was a nova explosion). Note also the additional synchronicity here. One of the dates here (-5.04.07) would correspond
to Good Friday per Julian Calendar (per Gregorian calendar, the date would be -5.04.04). Of course, Good Friday wasn't celebrated back then, but it's the same day of the year as the
day I've decrypted the message (2023.04.07, Good Friday).
UPDATE 2025.12.24:
Nova explosion, however, may not be the best interpretation of the object, a
comet may be more likely (although I wouldn't rule out UFO's too, as there are reasons to believe non-human intelligence was involved in Jesus' story).
What is very interesting about this interpretation is that simulations
put the date range for the most likely visit of the Magi at -5.06.03 to -5.06.13, with the most convincing date being -5.06.08. Thus, in agreement with my prediction of Jesus' birth
date (-5.06.03, ±2-3 days). This suggests that Magi have arrived only a couple of days after Jesus was born, if not on the same day.
There's some more interesting synchronicity here, again - the study I'm talking about here was released in December 2025, but I've encountered it on 2025.12.24 at sunset - Christmas Eve (the day
when Jesus' birth is commemorated), the day I'm writing this update. It's not only the date that is interesting here, it's the time as well - Christian liturgical
day starts at sunset (a practice inherited from Jewish tradition) - the eve that precedes the day is part of the day itself. Thus, one could even say I've encountered this on the start of
a Christmas day.
This correspondence does not imply that my soul was indeed in the Jesus' body, however, I believe his soul was at least of the same species as mine. All people experience stronger transformation at
specific ages of their lives. One physiological inflection point (peak), for most people, occurs about the age of 33-34. However, for some individuals, this transformation point is about the age
of 36-37, and in such case the transformation seems to be stronger. Since Jesus certainly wasn't an average man, and his transformation was certainly strong, I strongly believe he experienced this
transformation about the age of 36-37. And since the probability for death is elevated during transformation peaks (especially in case of stronger transformations like these), he also probably died
about that age, going in favour of the year 5 BC as the year of birth.
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Ageing/transforming bodies
I am aged 41 at this point in time (creation of this chapter). My hair is still black (dark brown) and thick with no signs of grey. However, I've started noticing some changes elsewhere about a year ago. Instead of
one or two grey hairs in my beard that appeared a couple of years ago I now see a couple of dozen, still vastly outnumbered by black hairs but a change nevertheless. Another change is the
possible change in eyesight. Until now my eyesight has been impeccable but I have been noticing signs of short-sightedness last year. Nothing serious and I won't be wearing spectacles any time
soon, but it was noticeable at times. However, I do not notice it now.
The reason I'm writing about my obviously slow ageing is only to provide another evidence going in favour of my hypotheses. I have predicted
previously that I should naturally die about the age of 84. This rate of ageing certainly goes in favour of that hypothesis. I have also hypothesized that one of my past incarnations
was I. Newton and that his intelligence and way of life started dominating my life after soul transformation about the age of 36. Some state that Newton's hair started naturally growing grey about
the age of 43. However, his hair actually turned grey for the first time when he was 27 years
old. The reasons are unknown - some speculated it was a result of his experiments or stress, Newton thought it was a disease. In any case, this greying was obviously not ageing
related (Newton died at the age of 84) and it may have eventually reversed (yes, studies show this is possible in non-ageing related greying), so one can safely assume that natural greying of his
hair did start some time about the age of 43. There are statements going in favour of similarity in physiology, e.g., J. Conduitt notes
on the old Newton:
"His head of hair, as white as snow, was full with no baldness. Even as an old man he retained the bloom and colour of youth and all his teeth except one."
2025.04.30
Apparently, the age of 43 is a transformational age for me as well. It is not a strong transformation, just like it wasn't for Newton, but some physiological changes are definitely
occurring. I've got some rash on my skin, nothing serious, but the last time I had rashes was before the previous transformation. I also started getting pimples on my face, nothing
serious, but I can't remember the last time I had these. There are some changes in behaviour as well. Previously, I didn't have a habit of smoking and drinking coffee at home. This seems to have
changed, again, nothing serious, but I am now drinking a cup of coffee daily and smoking 2 cigars on average (I'm not addicted, however - if there is no coffee or no cigars about, I skip
it). My hair, however, is not grey yet, but there are signs of a bit increased greying, particularly in my beard.
W. Stukeley said he was short-sighted young but not at old age. This is confirmed by Z. Pearce, who, a few days before Newton's death, visited him:
"I found him writing over his Chronology of Ancient Kingdoms, without the help of spectacles, at the greatest distance of the room from the windows, and with a parcel of books on the
table, casting a shade upon the paper. Seeing this, on my entering the room, I said to him, 'Sir, you seem to be writing in a place where you cannot so well see.' His answer was, 'A little
light serves me.'"
Conduitt stated however that Newton was short-sighted in his age but had not been so as a boy.
With all things considered I'd say that Newton too aged slowly. As for the short-sightedness, I believe it appeared at times but was not permanent - the cause for its appearance may be similar to
the cause of his early grey hair. And it seems temporary short-sightedness is happening to me too. Based on my experience, I believe ageing reversals happen at times of soul transformation.
After my own transformation in thirties even my face looked younger - some were even saying I have "ironed" my face. One could argue, however, that the reason I looked older before transformation is
stress and depression. But the fact is - depression is not only absent now, I'm incapable of being depressed now (sadness is something else though) so I attribute this to transformation rather than
to the absence of stressors.
Newton experienced soul transformation about the age of 35 and then again
about the age of 50, albeit a weaker one. Thus, I might experience another reversal about the age of 50.
Tesla too claimed impeccable eyesight and aged slowly (died aged 86). Not sure if he experienced temporary episodes of short-sightedness but it seems he too experienced at least two
transformations. According to literature, he experienced his 1st nervous breakdown at the age of 24, however, he was suffering
from a peculiar malady similar to amnesia at the age of 35-36 which culminated with a psychic event and his mother's death, and he experienced another transformation at
the age of 50.
Note that I have hypothesized elsewhere that people are most likely to transform about the time of death of one of the parents (or even grandparents), after witnessing transformation in my own
parents.
Note also that Newton's 1st transformation occurred about the time his mother died (he was aged 36 at the time). Tesla experienced 2nd transformation aged 50 - at the time his mother died.
I've experienced my 1st transformation about the time my grandfather died (from mother's side).
I don't remember if I had experienced something disturbing about the age of 24 (I did end up in hospital due to exhaustion sometime about that age but I don't remember exactly when) but
if I did it was nothing compared to what I experienced about the age of 36-37.
Alignment obviously exists between mental excursions of Newton and Tesla - both have experienced significant mental disturbance at about the ages of 36 and 50. As for the event in the
year 24 of Tesla - it was probably a result of exhaustion, not a long lasting event nor as significant, it's very much possible that Newton experienced something similar at that age.
And so far, alignment exists with my own experience, all that is left is the event about the year 50 to further confirm the hypothesis. I have no doubt that this event will occur, I'm just
wondering who is going to die at the time? Certainly, I'm not looking forward to it, but nature and logic points to my grandmother - from the mother's side of the family (it
seems I am, like Newton and Tesla, more aligned with the mother's side of genetics). At the time I reach 50, my grandmother should be 92 years of age. She is 86 at the time of this
writing (year 2025) and still in good health so she is probably the source of genetics highly correlated with my ageing/metabolism (she's also an ectomorph). However, events of soul-body
transformation are also times of elevated possibility for death, therefore, some possibility exists for my death as well. I have also calculated elevated probability for asteroid bombardment about
the year 2029 (I'll reach 48 years of age in that year) so this could all be synchronized.
Note that, for Jesus, his transformation about the age of 36-37 was also his death.
Note also that there are other similarities between Newton, Tesla, and I. Blue-grey
eyes, for example, (which are generally rare). Tesla (apparently Newton too) also had a similar metabolism to mine. Like me, he was relatively
tall (over 1.75 m) and had an unvarying smaller weight (less than 70 kg) - which is typical for ectomorphs. Like Newton and Tesla, I wasn't intimate with a lot of women. Interestingly, however, one
woman for whom one can, with greater certainty, say that Tesla was intimate with - Katharine, had
the same name as my ex-wife.
Redefinition of success
For a long time and still up to the time of this writing, definition of success in human society is generally correlated with money, material possessions, marriage, titles, grades, points and careers.
And, if for some reason, that doesn't make one happy, one is instructed to go see a doctor whose magical pills will make it all easier for one to suffer through.
Living in these systems, naturally, I was also trained to follow the path of such success.
But, following that path, although I did feel some satisfaction in earning my first money, with more and more of this success I was feeling less and less satisfied and more and more
depressed. On top of that, during my marriage, I was becoming less and less synchronized with my wife. All that was making me miserable. The worst part was that this depression was affecting my
intelligence. Even my passion for programming waned, which wouldn't be a problem had it been replaced by passion for something else. But it didn't at the time.
Eventually, even my marriage broke up and I felt like dying, being occasionally brought to life by the presence of my child.
The other thing that kept me going were walks in the woods, hills and mountains, often coupled with a search for mushrooms. I was slowly learning more and more about nature.
But living close to my ex wife and all the things I was supposed to left behind me, it was hard to focus on now, instead of bringing the past from subconsciousness into the arena.
Coupled with the fact that my work was gone and I needed money to support the child, that resulted in a move to Zagreb. A place not close to my ex wife but also not too far from my son.
This indeed proved to be a good decision for my health (although I am now convinced this move was synchronized with changes in my organism and consequently improvement in health).
In any case, this move could not have been avoided.
Ever since I was a child, I always felt that one day I am going to achieve something significant and I felt this was going to be the understanding of the universe. The problem is, the system
trained me to concentrate on its definition of my success (which conveniently can be exploited by it) and, even though I always followed science and occasionally contemplated on the
universe, I never had the time to fully focus on it and do work which would actually make me feel happy.
I realized I have to change that. That is why I didn't search for high salary, but a job easy for me to do and also one with no overtimes and high pressure.
The job at NSK was perfect for that. And even though I had to be there 40 hours per week, since the job was not very challenging for me, there would often be some time for me to work on my theories
besides doing the job for them.
Finally, now I felt I was on the path to success. I still had a job so I still wasn't successful, but I knew I will eventually quit jobs so I can fully focus on satisfying work.
Two years after, I did that, eventually I started thinking my theories were mature enough for publishing so I have created a website where I started presenting my works.
However, I was in a different state at the time and after I got out of it I realized the work is actually far from being mature. This wasn't a problem as I wasn't really advertising the work and
apart from occasional glimpses by a friend or relative who generally don't read it all and don't understand most of it, there are no human visitors.
It's been now almost 6 years since I've started working on all that is on the website but I have no plans to actually publish any of it in any journal (I did try a couple of
times earlier though), after all, I'm still doing updates.
I might self-publish some of the work as books somewhere but I'm in no hurry to do that. This never was about the world and I'm not interested in fame although I wouldn't mind getting something
back from those who do find it useful.
2025.04.04
I did not give up on publishing completely. However, my major works are too big for journals and I have no funds to publish or promote books. Besides, the climate in mainstream science seems
to be deteriorating and it's very hard to publish something that helps advancing science rather than advancing someone's career.
In any case, I am convinced the local universe has already found a way for this work to reach my next incarnation, if one more of me is destined, once again, to roam the surface of this
perfect child we call our planet.
Article revised and updated thoroughly.